Can You Guess What These 100 Hilarious Jokes Have in Common? You Won't Believe It! | Part 1
In this blog, we will explore the wonderful world of jokes. Specifically, we will focus on 100 marks using the same keyword: "guess what jokes" Whether you're looking for a quick laugh or want to impress your friends with your unique sense of humor, these jokes will surely tickle your funny bone.
From puns to one-liners, we've got it all. Some of these jokes are silly, clever, and downright corny. But no matter your style of humor, there's something here for everyone.
So sit back, relax, and get ready to laugh your way through 100 hilarious jokes. Who knows, you might find a new favorite that you can use to entertain your friends and family for years to come. Let's get started!
Guess what? I just wrote a book on reverse psychology, but nobody wants to read it.
Guess what? I saw a sign on the lawn of a drug rehab center that said, "Keep off the grass."
Guess what? I tried to start a hot air balloon business, but it never really took off.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant that serves midnight," but they were closed. I guess they were having a breakfast for dinner.
Guess what? I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
Guess what? I just got a job as a professional cuddler. I make $50 an hour. It's not much, but at least it hugs the bills.
Guess what? I tried to organize a hide-and-seek tournament, but it was a complete failure. Good players are hard to find.
Guess what? I went to a psychic, and she told me I was going to be rich and famous. I asked her when, and she said, "I don't know, but at least you have something to look forward to."
Guess what? I just got back from a once-in-a-lifetime vacation. I'll tell you what, never again.
Guess what? I'm thinking of getting a job as a professional boxer. It would be a knockout career.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a steak. The waiter asked me how I wanted it cooked. I said, "On a stove."
Guess what? I invented a new word: Plagiarism.
Guess what? I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what they're laced with, but I've been tripping all day.
Guess what? I went to a seafood restaurant and slipped on a mussel.
Guess what? I'm learning sign language. It's very handy.
Guess what? I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
Guess what? I lost my job at the bank today. An old lady came in and asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Guess what? I have a fear of speed bumps. I call it "gomphophobia."
Guess what? I have a photographic memory, but I always forget to put the film in.
Guess what? I tried to catch some fog earlier, but I mist.
Guess what? I got a job as a professional cleaner. It's a dirty job, but somebody's gotta do it.
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a gorilla reading a book. It was called "The Ape's Guide to Philosophy."
Guess what? I got a job as a professional tennis player, but love meant nothing to me.
Guess what? I tried to organize a space-themed party, but the planetarium fell through.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant, and the waiter said they were out of the soup. I said, "Well then, what's all this in my bowl?"
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a burger, but the bun was too big. I said, "This bun is too big," and the waiter said, "I'm sorry, Sir, we don't control the size of the cows."
Guess what? I went to a zoo, and the only animal there was a dog. It was a shitzu.
Guess what? I got a job at a zoo because I was a lion tamer. Turns out it was just a desk job.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a pizza. The waiter asked if I wanted it cut into six or eight slices. I said, "Six, I could never eat eight."
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a chicken and an egg. I'll let you know which comes first.
Guess what? I went to a museum and saw a dinosaur bone exhibit. I asked the guide what the bones were made of, and she said, "Oh, just fossil fuels."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a giraffe drinking coffee. I guess he needed a little pick-me-up.
Guess what? I tried to start a hot air balloon business, but it never really took off.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a salad. The waiter asked if I wanted dressing, and I said, "No, I'll just eat it like this. I don't want to overdress."
Guess what? I tried to organize a rap battle, but it ended up being a wrap battle. We just made sandwiches all day.
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a snake with a hat on. I asked the zookeeper why the snake was wearing a hat, and he said, "Oh, he just wanted to add a little sssstyle."
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a burger, but the bun was too small. I said, "This bun is too small," and the waiter said, "I'm sorry, sir, we don't control the size of the cows."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a monkey with a guitar. He was playing some really good tunes, but he was a bit of a primate donna.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a steak. The waiter asked me how I wanted it cooked, and I said, "With fire."
Guess what? I tried to organize a beard competition, but it was a complete hair failure.
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a koala sleeping in a tree. I guess he was just koala-fying his time.
Guess what? I tried to organize a marathon, but it ended up being more of a snack-a-thon. We just ate a lot of food.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a sandwich, but it was really dry. I said to the waiter, "This sandwich is really dry," and he said, "Well, it's a desert sandwich."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a gorilla reading a book. It was called "How to Build a Treehouse."
Guess what? I tried to organize a talent show, but it was a complete flop. All of the acts were terrible.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a milkshake, but it was too thick. I said, "This milkshake is too thick," and the waiter said, "Well, it's a concrete mixer."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a lion sleeping. I guess he was taking a cat nap.
Guess what? I tried to organize a spelling bee, but I didn't have enough letters.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a salad. The waiter asked if I wanted croutons, and I said, "No thanks, I'm already in a bit of a jam."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw an elephant playing football. He was really good, but he was a bit of a trunk player.
Guess what? I tried to organize a fashion show, but it was a complete wardrobe malfunction. None of the clothes fit properly.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a soup, but it was too hot. I said, "This soup is too hot," and the waiter said, "Well, that's what happens when you order hot soup."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a hippopotamus taking a shower. He was really getting in there and really scrubbing behind his ears. I guess he was getting ready for a big date or something.
Guess what? I tried to organize a pet show, but it was a real cat-tastrophe. None of the pets wanted to perform.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a pizza. The waiter asked if I wanted any toppings, and I said, "Sure, how about some roof tiles?"
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a penguin sunbathing. I guess he wanted to get a little bit of a tan-guin.
Guess what? I tried to organize a book club, but nobody wanted to read the book. They said it was a real novel-ty item.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a salad, but it was really boring. I said to the waiter "This salad is really boring," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a plain salad."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a kangaroo boxing with a gorilla. It was a real knockout match.
Guess what? I tried to organize a dance party, but it was a complete flop. Nobody knew how to dance.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a steak, but it was really tough. I said to the waiter "This steak is really tough," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a leather steak."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a flamingo walking on two legs. I guess he wanted to show off his fancy footwork.
Guess what? I tried to organize a movie night, but nobody wanted to watch the movie. They said it was a real film-amentary.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a burger, but it was really bland. I said to the waiter "This burger is really bland," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a plain burger."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a zebra wearing a suit. I guess he was trying to zebra up his wardrobe.
Guess what? I tried to organize a karaoke night, but it was a complete disaster. Nobody could carry a tune.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a salad, but it was really wilted. I said to the waiter "This salad is really wilted," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a day-old salad."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a sloth driving a car. He was going really slow, but he didn't seem to mind.
Guess what? I tried to organize a game night, but it was a real board-game. Nobody wanted to play.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a pizza, but it was really greasy. I said to the waiter "This pizza is really greasy," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a deep-dish pizza."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a parrot wearing glasses. I guess he had perfect peck-tion.
Guess what? I tried to organize a magic show, but it was a complete trick-ster. None of the tricks worked.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a steak, but it was really burnt. I said to the waiter "This steak is really burnt," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a charcoal steak."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a camel drinking soda. I guess he wanted to hump a little caffeine.
Guess what? I tried to make a cake from scratch, but it turned out to be a real batter-fail. It was a disaster.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a seafood platter, but it was really fishy. I said to the waiter "This seafood platter is really fishy," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order seafood in a landlocked state."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a chimpanzee using a computer. I guess he was trying to ape technology.
Guess what? I tried to organize a camping trip, but it was a real tent-tative plan. Nobody was sure they wanted to go.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a sandwich, but it was really dry. I said to the waiter, "This sandwich is really dry," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a sandwich without any sauce or condiments."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a lion wearing a crown. I guess he was the king of the jungle.
Guess what? I tried to make a smoothie, but it was a real blend-er. I accidentally put in too much spinach, and it tasted terrible.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a burrito, but it was really spicy. I said to the waiter, "This burrito is really spicy," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order the extra-hot sauce."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a hippopotamus wearing a tutu. I guess she wanted to do some ballet.
Guess what? I tried to organize a picnic, but it was a real ant-agonizing experience. The ants kept crawling all over the food.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a salad, but it was really smelly. I said to the waiter "This salad is really smelly," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a salad with blue cheese dressing."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a gorilla playing chess. I guess he was a real chess-ape.
Guess what? I tried to make a sandwich, but it was a real bread-down. The bread was stale, and the filling was dry.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a pizza, but it was really cold. I said to the waiter, "This pizza is really cold," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a pizza with a lot of toppings, and it takes longer to cook."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a giraffe eating ice cream. I guess he had a really long tongue to lick the cone.
Guess what? I tried to organize a potluck, but it was a real dish-aster. Everybody brought the same dish, and nobody wanted to try anything new.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a pasta dish, but it was really mushy. I said to the waiter, "This pasta is really mushy," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you overcook the pasta."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a koala sleeping in a tree. I guess he was really tired.
Guess what? I tried to make a smoothie, but it was a real fruit-tastrophe. I accidentally put in too many different fruits, and it tasted terrible.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a burger, but it was really raw. I said to the waiter, "This burger is really raw," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order it rare."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a kangaroo boxing with a wallaby. I guess they were having a hoppy fight.
Guess what? I tried to organize a game night, but it was a real board-dom. Nobody wanted to play anything except Monopoly.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a steak, but it was really tough. I said to the waiter, "This steak is really tough," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order a steak well-done."
Guess what? I went to a zoo and saw a parrot singing karaoke. I guess he was a real party animal.
Guess what? I tried to make a salad, but it was a real lettuce-down. The lettuce was wilted, and the dressing was too sour.
Guess what? I went to a restaurant and ordered a dessert, but it was really bland. I said to the waiter, "This dessert is really bland," and he said, "Well, that's what happens when you order the sugar-free option."
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